Dear Porn Producers

Posted with permission from the Pee is for Pleasure tumblr.

Dear porn makers,

Here are a few things that I am sick of seeing:

1. The camera person talking and/or getting involved in the action.
• This was cute for a while, and while it can be really good when done right (Seymour Butts, for example), it’s [stupid] and annoying now. Just let the people in the scene do their thing. Let them focus on each other so they can build up some energy with each other, making the scene sexier. You barking orders, “do this, do that” or shoving your fingers or cock in there takes away from the experience and is annoying. Stop it. Bad porn maker.
2. Taking pictures during the scene.
• Seriously. Stop taking pictures during the scene! I don’t want to hear the clicking or see the flash. It’s dumb and takes away from whatever is going on in the scene. If you need promo images, take them from film or edit out the parts where you’re taking pictures. It’s called post production.
3. Participants in the scene staring at the camera.
• I can see how this has its fans and can be exciting, but it’s getting ridiculous. Pay attention to what you’re doing! When you’re staring at the camera and making stupid faces (they’re not sexy, sorry), it just kills the scene. It makes me feel like you’re not enjoying what’s going on but that if you pander enough to the viewer, they’ll pop through the camera and save you. It’s horrible. Stop it.
4. Overdoing it.
• Okay, I get it, you’re a squirt/pee/anal/spit/fisting/kissing/huge penetration/etc video. Part of why we want to see these videos is to see these acts performed sexually. So, put some sex in there! Let the people in the scene do something that would actually get them off while having these fetishes enhance the experience. Yes, having a part of your body peed on or kissing so much that spit drools down your chins is a definite turn on, but it’s not going to make someone cum (very often) in and of itself. How about peeing on a pussy and then going down and licking it until she cums? I understand that you’re focusing on a fetish, but don’t forget that you’re also portraying sex; don’t let that get lost by overdoing the fetish. Overdoing it makes it feel like the participants are just doing it for the camera (which, I get it, they are) and not actually enjoying what they’re doing. In other words, it feels forced (not in an against the will kind of way, but in a scripted kind of way). Let the scene be organic and natural. It will be much, much sexier. Promise.
5. Terrible sound.
• Yes, this may seem minor, but when the sound is screwed up due to a poor microphone, it is really annoying. Echoes, over-modulation, loud background noises, low volumes, and uneven sound levels are something that should not exist in a professional production. Or even most amateur ones with today’s technology.
6. Over-abundance of choking, gagging, degradation, and humiliation.
• I get that it’s sexy to a lot of people (including myself from time to time), but every scene doesn’t need it. So many scenes focus on choking, gagging, and dominance, that it’s diluted and, at times, just distracting. “Oh look, these experimenting first time lesbians are so well versed that they’re gagging each other with a giant dildo!” It is just odd in many scenes that I’ve seen it in. I’m not saying this doesn’t have a rightful place, just that it should be kept in its rightful place.
7. Disinterested participants.
• Too many scenes are uninspired and [stupid] because the participants just don’t appear to be into it. This is especially true in many of the “[trans]” videos that I’ve seen. I don’t know if it is bad direction, them focusing too much on a scripted scene, or a genuine “I just do this to pay the bills” attitude, but it’s really disheartening to see a scene killed by someone getting sucked or fucked and their body doesn’t move at all, their face is one of boredom, and they are looking off camera for no reason (or AT the camera, pleading for it to end). Let’s fix this, shall we?
8. Constant moaning.
• Moaning is sexy. So are grunts, growls, groans, and deep or rapid breathing. They demonstrate enjoyment and pleasure. However, too often it sounds like the same moans, grunts, etc. are just looped throughout the scene - and they don’t fucking stop! When combined with the “Disinterested Participants” noted above, it’s downright comical. You’re not making a comedy - you’re making porn. Lets get this right. Let the participants enjoy themselves and make natural, normal sounds of pleasure. Your scene will be far sexier this way.
9. Shaking camera or constantly moving camera.
• This isn’t a war movie. It’s porn. Set up multiple cameras, get the angles and shots you want, and leave the shaking action camera, the super zoom in, and the moving camera to the professionals. You’re just embarrassing yourselves with these. If you move the cameras to get a better scene, then edit the movement out in post production (there’s that phrase again!).
10. Music.
• There is absolutely no need for music in a porn scene, ever. Save the money and use it for another camera and/or post production.
• Yeah, okay, maybe a striptease, but that’s about it.
11. Over-use of degrading titles.
• Bitch, slut, whore, etc. are tired, [stupid], and degrading. How about having some respect for the people you’re making money off of. I get that in many types of films these terms (and others) are the norm and are expected. But, they don’t need to be included in everything. Just because a woman enjoys getting pissed on doesn’t mean she is a “piss whore”. It means that she’s an adult woman that enjoys being peed on! Lets have some respect out there, shall we? Use them when appropriate for the scene type, but otherwise, leave them where they belong - in silence.

That’s all I can think of right now. Just thought I’d share. I hope this helps improve the quality of the porn out there in some small way.

Agree? Disagree? Want to add something? Please do!

Posted with permission from the Pee is for Pleasure tumblr.